“When Jesus saw him and knew he had been ill for a long time, he asked him, “Would you like to get well?”
John 5:6
Bob told me to get a job.
No listen, it gets worse!
He also told me to find my wife’s love language. Which is what first, led me to some incredibly, difficult understandings.
— Ever since this guy, Bob, started putting his two cents in, I’ve kind of been getting the raw end of the deals. All of his advice is hard! The kind of stuff that forces me to have to do things that makes my flesh melt into a boil. And every time I go to him, he reinforces some truth I’ve been sniffing out, in the Word. It’s always something I was kind of hoping, wasn’t true; challenging things like, picking up my cross and what all that means. The whole “being the punching bag” idea –it’s real.
I run to him now, when the only thing I can see is my Bride, finally having enough of me, if I just keeeep talking. And every time Bob and I sit down together, I blow up, and pace, and flail my arms about; and then, after all the things I rant and rave about — all my whining and reasoning about wisdom and how I’m “doing way better than I used to be”–he just smiles and says something wise like “ahh, the ol’ habit of comparing ourselves to our past selves…”
Now come on! What am I supposed to say!?
I do speak in jest, though, really. These are the lessons I’m learning right now but, I’m not angry at Bob, or God, about them –not entirely, anymore. And it’s super obvious to see the Lord using satan’s “fiery arrows,” to teach me how to be angry and not sin; how to love the world through all the mess we feel they put us through. (Ephesians 4:26)
Let’s just say, I’m getting too many opportunities to ‘not do so well’ and it seems like I’m really taking advantage of every one of them. But God has been working with me to improve, as He peels back the sheets of misdirection, cover-up and lies that the enemy has used, over the years, to hide agreements that I’ve made in my spirit that were quite, entirely, wrong. Though I really would not like it to have, it seems the nature of the sin revealed, landed squarely on what no soul would refute as being, big, fat, ugly, pride. It may be the actual, single, solitary source of pretty much every single wrong action I take.
I discovered that pride is so intertwined in me, that it’s no wonder the humility process, I’m undergoing, has been so treacherous, most times. I mean they are opposite forces; pride and humility. I’m moving from dark, to light –from death, to life. It’s pretty intrinsic — death. The fact that I even can come back from any of this is an outright impossibility. If it weren’t for Jesus, my name would end up being ‘Pride,’ and there would be nothing left of me to experience.
It’s not entirely embarrassing though, because, it’s really, what I was expecting –and aggressively attempting to gut out of myself, for that matter.
Ephesians 4:2 says; “Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.”
It turns out, my wife’s live language is “acts of service.”
I don’t like my wife’s love language.
It’s cleaning!
It’s making coffee, changing diapers, and sorting toys. It’s doctors’ forms and waiting rooms, and errand runs — and back rubs! It’s looking like, having an “occupation” is on the list too… I don’t like where this all ended up!
No, I don’t like the facts, but I got up. I’m not a ‘sit-on-my-butt’ kind of guy anymore, anyway, so don’t you think I went from zero to sixty suddenly or anything. Maybe like; fifty to eighty.
Either way, the laundry gets done, the house stays clean, and the kids get to where they need to be. I also, though no longer “employed,” have brought in some money here and there; and food; and…whatever… ‘stuff.’
But it’s not me; it’s God.
God can use any vessel.
Nonetheless, it hasn’t really paid the necessary bills. (It’s not that we’re hurting because we don’t have enough money; we are hurting because we are new and inexperienced in being intentional with our income.) But God will provide; I can’t get into all I believe about the societal work world and Christ. It’s a mile long conversation, and it’s not important, I’m getting a job.
There’s a story in John 5, where Jesus approaches a man and asks him this same question; “Do you want to get well?”
If you really dig into this question, and take it seriously, the answer should cause you to stir.
Allow me to tell you a “parable,” to hopefully, guide you to a new revelation.
Almost every time I send a daughter of mine, on a mission to do something for me, more often than not, she’ll come back claiming the task is too difficult, or point out some other reason why the child cannot accomplish the goal or find the item in question, herself.
Parents; what is it we then, tend to do?
We get up and find a way to fix it ourselves, right? If we want it done, we will make it happen.
Why can’t my daughter find the “Korean Chili Flakes” spice jar in the cabinet when I ask her to? Because, my daughters aren’t chefs, and they don’t care about Korean Chili Flakes, simple as that. They didn’t know they existed, and they didn’t think we had them, anyway. They just don’t ever want them as bad as I do.
If they, on the other hand, do have a vested interest in the outcome of a treasure search, say, a hairbrush, or a concert ticket, for example. They’d come to me and ask me to find it. I’d help them look for a moment or two but then, at a certain point, when they’re crying and freaking out about it, I’d have to throw the towel in and give up. And because of the story of the beggar, by the pool of Bethesda (in John 1), I’ve learned a really good response for these times;
“Do you want to go to the concert?”
That’s when they storm off, realizing I am no longer going to help. Eventually, they find the tickets, or whatever it is they lost. Or they don’t. But they do the work.
The point is, when a human being doesn’t really care, or believe, or see the value of doing something, they won’t live in a way that causes its accomplishment. This is why Jesus asks people, “do you want to get well?”
Are you willing to do what it takes to be healed?
If you have health troubles; Are you willing to eat better, to be healed? To work out? Exercise? If you ended up in a condition where you would die within hours, unless you changed your diet to only leafy greens and bananas, would you be willing to do it for the rest of your life?
Are you willing to “sell all your belongings, and give to the poor”? Like that rich man, in the gospels, was instructed to do?
You see how it comes down to a matter of ‘desire’? If we are not truly willing to do what it takes to be healed, then it is most likely true that, we have already weighed the ‘work-to-reward’ ratio and chosen, somewhere deeper inside of us, that, it’s not really, worth it. We decide that, if that’s the full cost, then we don’t really want it anyway.
This kind of failure is addressed in Luke 14, where I spoke of earlier, about “carrying my cross.” In verse 33, it tells us we have to give up “everything.” I’ll quote it for you, word for word;
“…those of you who do not give up everything you have cannot be my disciples.”
So when Jesus asks us if we want to get well, He’s really asking us, are we prepared to go through what it takes to get there? Which essentially breaks down to one word;
“everything.”
If you ask me, am I willing to do what it takes to express my love to my Bride — or am I willing to do what it takes to show my daughters what a real man looks like; to show the world what Jesus looks like? Am I willing to do what it takes to know, Jesus?
Am I willing, to be joked about, and spit on? Or abused, rejected, cursed, and wounded — to know Jesus?
Do I want to get well? Or does it cost too much?
Let’s keep going then, shall we?
Hasta luego, amigos.
Until next week…
– God Exists –
Did you know you can subscribe to this blog? If you’re an avid reader, submit an email address and you’ll receive a notification when a new post is published.
Don’t miss out!
Leave a Reply