1:37 pm
I’ve been walking the city for a bit now. And as I have walked nearly 170 miles in the last 2 months, (no exaggeration) I’ve been finding pennies everywhere I go. This started just before I left for Omaha, NE for a mission trip with the ministry. Though the trip itself was awfully difficult for me, I received absolute divine strength through it and guidance because of it. The penny, seen as a nuisance to almost anyone looking for help, has become a symbol of God’s provision to me.
In the beginning, the revelation came as a simple sentence, I feel, was “downloaded” from God. He said; “Just because it’s not enough, doesn’t mean it’s not something.”
The men in the ministry home would give me their pennies. They’d want the silver change, but the copper I could keep. And what started happening, because of my needy situation and God’s amazing formula for multiplication, was me attaining things that no one else had the access to receive. I would gather all the pennies that no one else saw as valuable.
Each one I find is a little, flirtatious poke from my God and Lover, that shows that He sees me and that I do not have to worry or figure things out on my own. Each one says to me, (Matthew 6:33) …in all things, seek first My kingdom and My righteousness, and all you need will be provided, by Me.
Eventually, God began blessing me with these gestures of assurance daily, as I pushed into obedience to Him. There has not been one single day in the past two months in which I did not find three or five or two pennies or other amounts of change, in the most obvious, hidden, or just plain interesting places. Even early on in the ministry, when I did not have a job. I would not sit and do nothing, I did not sit outside and smoke cigarettes, I did not sleep all that I wanted… I cleaned as much as I could. All day. If I was in the home and not in His Word at the time, I would find something to clean. Now this was extremely difficult. The other 18 or so men did not clean much, or very well when they did. They seemed to have always made efforts to be more untidy, more impassive than one would imagine possible by just living naturally. If I cleaned a spot, it was almost a guarantee that someone would come along, see a nice clean spot, and set their agenda to dismantle, grease up, or clutter the area. I would end up feeling that all my efforts were anti-productive. But I was determined to become better. Not to act “better than them” as in cleaner, or more mature, or even more attentive, but to live in such a way that the outside world, others in my life, could not affect me in a way that would impede with my efforts to be anything other than the man I want to be, the man of uprightness and love. Integrity and value. I saw a glimpse of God at a certain point and I knew what I was after. So in washing and putting away the dishes, I would find Tupperware or unclaimed dishes in which I could put to use. I would clean the fridge and discover forgotten food that old house members left behind when they left the ministry, and upon sweeping the floor, I would find lost change. I would clean the van out every time I got in, and I would find change on the floor… every time. The things I didn’t really want to do, came with (though small) rewards and, in time, my change pile began to afford things.
It turned out, as I read all the signs, called all the numbers and asked all the questions, that the thrift stores in the area were partial to the men’s ministry. I discovered many, many perks that the other men, even before me, never knew about. Which turned a trip to the Wright County Crisis Center Thrift Store with $1.34 into a super lucrative venture. And often, even, somehow I would compile more change on the way out and ended up leaving with more money than I entered with, as well as arms full of books, clothes, toiletries and other useful household items that I had no other way of getting.
Matthew 12:13 “Whoever has, will be given more, and they will have an abundance. Whoever does not have, even what they have will be taken from them. “
Do you notice that the “have-nots” do actually have something. As the scripture goes on to read, it’s about what you see and hear. $1.34 is not $100. But it is also not “nothing.” It’s all about perspective…
Aaaaaanyway, the story behind this post is that the change I’m now finding so placed, is placed so obviously. The other day, at my apartment, my goal was to pull all the weeds…and the weeds went all the way down the side of the house, to the back gate. As I reluctantly but ‘doggedly’ (somehow in the same moment) pressed on, pulling weeds, I found at the end of the trail, a small pile of change under the final clump of growth. .85¢ to be exact. I laughed. “Thank You God. How sweet.” I had reached my goal…and got a gift.
The other day crossing a parking lot, struggling in my thoughts of my day, I found a pile of change, placed on a concrete median at the edge of the parking lot near the entryway to the store.
Today, Google Maps was incorrectly giving me the wrong directions. So I tuned to the Lord as I walked. I looked, at one point, to the ground and there was a scattered pile of pennies. Haha, “Lord, you love me so well.”
Then a few more pennies…
Then a couple more…
There was a trail of shiny pennies along my path down the street. I was excited to pick up .22¢! It was not just a found money moment for me. It was a love note. It was a pat on the back. It was the Creator Himself, my Abba Father, bending down, stooping to the lowly level of grungy ol’ South City streets and saying “you are being faithful, my child.”
“I see you. And I’m here with you.”
My Bride and I’s 16th anniversary came. I ordered flowers and sent them to her anonymously. As I was on the phone, walking down the street, setting up the order, I found another trail of pennies. I was in such glee that I used the opportunity to tell the lady from Griffith’s flowers part of my story.
This is why I keep going. I enjoy a “quality life.” I like video games and technology… having my own place and potential to go into the future with my family is definitely a driving force. Having people like me and wealth to do with what I please? Sure, but to have all of the Power and Love and Goodness that ever existed, or will ever exist, pour out to me a personal blessing, a nod to my efforts, a poke on the shoulder to say “I love you… keep going.” That’s what I’m after.
And when I’m ready to handle it, when I’m mature enough to be trusted with lots, I believe my God will turn my “5 loaves and 2 fishes” worth of pennies into “an abundant harvest” that overflows into the lives of all those around me.
Thanks for reading.
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